The G.O.L.E.M. of Progress

The citizens of Undermine cry out for help! They need protection! They need joy! They need to get by! As an inventor, I've spent my life building somethin' that'll solve our people's problems, and it's just about ready for a test run. I'm calling it my Goblin Optimal Livability Enhancement Machine, or G.O.L.E.M. for short! Find some problems and take it out for a spin- and take my son with you! Pitz doesn't have an inventor's bone in his body, but certainly he can yak it up with the neighbors.